A phrase I’ve heard all my life. Most commonly at the drawn-out end of a long club night. When the dregs of us make one final stumbling trip to the toilet and find another heartbroken girl, swallowed up by misery upon the bathroom floor, her group of friends wiping her mascara smudged eyes and slurrily exclaiming “all men can die”.
Anger expressed in this way can sometimes seem understandable. What woman or girl do you know who hasn’t been hurt by the opposite gender in some way or another? However, generalised hate being personified by the “I hate men” statement that is prolific across social media risks distorting the principles of feminism itself. This hate can cause damage its wider rhetoric, to young girls especially.
There’s not a day where I haven’t come across a video on Instagram or Tiktok that promotes this generalised anti-male sentiment. With 91% of girls aged 13-18 utilising these platforms (US Department of Heath), “I hate men” has become widespread and, as a result, socially impactful. Daily exposure to this rhetoric may lead adolescent girls to perceive feminism as fundamentally anti-male as a whole, thereby limiting their ability to engage with feminist ideas in a more open and informed way.
Beyond misrepresenting feminist principles, the normalization of the “I hate men” rhetoric risks creating fear, distrust, and adversarial thinking among young girls. By presenting men as a homogenous and inherently harmful collective, such discourse encourages the generalization of individual experiences and may shape how girls approach relationships, friendships and wider social interaction with men. This framing limits opportunities for trust and empathy across all genders, which are essential qualities for development in feminist ideology, and contributes to the undercurrent of fear that already threads itself throughout girlhood. The type of fear that makes us run home with pointed keys clenched in between our fingers.
-Lottie Horn
Volunteer Writer
Girl Museum